There is an unspoken war fare going on with the self-esteem of women today. From every angle I am bombarded with images of decorative nails, intriguing hairstyles and snap shots of our daily “looks”. Now don’t get me wrong there is nothing wrong with taking pride in our appearance, the problem is when that alone defines us; when we become nothing more than a long weave or a creative nail. When our worth is wrapped up in our appearance and the better we look the more highly we think of ourselves.
What is the motivation? Maybe it is for men. So they will look at us more? So that we can captivate someone long enough to sustain a relationship? Or we can gain value from the abundance of attention that we receive? That was me. For many years I was wrapped up in my appearance that I failed to define my worth. I was so focused on looking amazing that my attitude sucked. I didn’t understand why my relationships were failing and why things were not working out. When I gained weight it was the end of the world because my appearance which I used to validate myself was crumbling. I no longer had a foundation to stand on. Embarking on the journey to becoming healthy was only the beginning of my lesson in self-worth. Even when I lost weight I still looked for validation from people especially men. I could never have admitted this at the time but it was true. I had a false sense of confidence that was eroding every day. I battled with deep depression and hurt.
I wish I could say that it was my triathlons or healthy eating that saved me, but that was only a bi-product of the ultimate solution. It wasn’t until I built a real relationship with God and accepted Christ into my life that I began to know my worth. It was quite fascinating because God began to open up little pockets of worth all over. I started training for races and became athletic which built up my physical worth. I started writing and began sharing on this website which built my creative worth. I began to cook and take an interest in healthy eating which built up my hospitable worth. More recently I took up gardening or as I like to call it farming and built up my collective worth. There are so many more facets of me. Now my worth doesn’t lie in how great my appearance is but how wonderful I am through God because he has revealed MY special gifts.
Now I am a woman who can grow my dinner, cook it into something delicious and eloquently share my testimony on how it all happened. I say this all to say: Don’t put your worth in things that fade. All around us society tells us how to look and act but God calls us to be different and unique. Embrace that!
Please share your thoughts and comments.