I had the opportunity to sit down with Black Enterprise and talk about the motivation behind starting Paparoxi. I really wanted to inspire people who were unemployed and struggling to find work to think outside of the box as far as their next career move. Check out the piece and leave your comments!
Yesterday, many of you were probably laughing hysterically at the video “Shit white girls say to black girls” by one of my favorite you tubers' Chescaleigh . I have been watching her videos for some time and she is talented. Well yesterday was life changing for Chescaleigh because her video went viral over 1.5 million views. She posted this on her facebook page today:
“It took 3 years of doing stand up, 4 years of being a YouTube partner, 5 years of writing and editing weekly videos and then in 24 hours my entire life has changed. This just doesn't feel real.”
Not only was that inspiring but it really got me thinking about dreams people have for their lives. Through social media we all are privy to the friends who are always posting new music, telling people to come to their shows, writing new material, advertising their jewelry line or getting people to join a weight loss challenge (he he). I feel a sense of camaraderie with people like this, because I understand the struggle. It is hard to see a dream through. It usually goes something like this: birthing a dream, sharing your dream, having people call you crazy or diminish what you are doing, spending countless hours working on your dream, sacrificing money and time to see it through, looking at other people around you make it, dealing with grief and mild depression when nothing seems to be happening or no one is listening and then one day all the hard work pays off.
Chescaleigh's story is so inspiring because I saw yesterday the “hard work paying off” right before my eyes. I think as we grow up and life happens the amount of people that are still working on a dream begins to dwindle. Those who are still grinding stand out. Of course there is pressure from people to “find a normal path.” However, it is so important to have that dream for your life and work hard towards it; to keep pressing when the going gets tough and when it seems like nothing is going to work out. I have noticed once you get past a certain amount of years working on your dream, the amount of people that are doing the same start to dwindle. At one point it seemed like a herd of people trying to take your spot, it then becomes a handful that share your same work ethic. Then opportunity meets all your preparation and BAM success!
The path to your dream is a journey. Along the journey you are inspiring others to follow their dreams. Regardless of if you get your big break or not, being able to change the trajectory of another person's life is a success in and of itself.
I wrote this quote in 2006 that seems really appropriate:
"The thing that separates the average from the excellent, the Haves from the Have-nots, and the weak from the strong, is that the lesser sit around and wait to be taught, but the Strong teach themselves"
What is the dream you have for your life? What are the hurdles you are facing? Please share your comments and thoughts.
A while back I saw this quote on twitter by jewelery designer Melody Eshani. I cyber-stalk her life sometimes. She just seems so at peace and confident not to mention beautiful, talented and successful. When I read this it really hit me like a ton of bricks. It surpassed being an “ah ha” moment it was a soul altering moment.
Just think for a moment. Everyday we wake up, get dressed and go out into the world trying to build and be more of something every single day. We constantly are setting goals, meeting deadlines and starting new projects in hopes of getting to the success level that we aspire to be. We call it “The Grind”. Constantly moving, working and striving. With this one quote that sort of changes everything.
“Stop waiting to be who you already are”
Powerful. Why are we waiting? Prolonging and preparing. Saving and resisting. Why cant we just call ourselves the titles that we desire to be. There is a hesitation. We often discredit ourselves. Down play our impact. It goes something like: “I cant call myself this because I have not been doing it for long enough, I have not paid my dues, I don't have the money to get what I really need to be this, I don't have a website, I haven't worked with enough people, My portfolio isn't big enough, Nobody knows who I am, I am so behind right now, I don't know where to start, I don't know if I am good enough...”
It really boils down to the belief deep down inside that we are not good enough. So we wait. I think the wait comes in different forms for different people. Waiting to some is just not starting at all. Waiting is not fully calling ourselves what we are. Waiting is doing things on a small scale because we don't believe we deserve more. Waiting is sabotaging projects with tardiness, unresponsiveness and procrastination. Waiting is being unfocused, starting 5 different projects but not truly finishing any of them. I am guilty of all of this.
So in the eve of the New Year I challenge you to STOP WAITING! You already are an artist, successful musician, best selling writer, wealthy mogul, world renown fashion designer, a killer attorney, the best teacher and much much more. You already are this person so own it. When we try to be less of who we are we fail at stepping into our great destiny.
What do you think? Are you waiting to be something? Share your thoughts.
I'm a singer/songwriter, so music is my everything. I'm also a natural living blogger. I provide support for those looking to transition into more health conscious beauty, nutrition and fitness routines.
Name one person, place or thing that inspires you the most?
Wow. That's a super tough one. I'm surrounded by awesome people and have been on so many life changing trips around the world! I guess the most impactful, to my personal development, would have to be the teachings of Osho. He was a spiritual teacher, back in the day, with a huge international following. You need to read his books and watch his youtube vids! Seriously! They will completely change your outlook on life, love and your pursuit of happiness. I've learned so much about my emotional wellness through his words. Truly one of my favorite people, ever.
One thing most people don't know about you?
I lived in Brazil for a year studying Political Science and can speak Portuguese fluently. The best time of my life!
How do you stay healthy and in shape?
Being a vegetarian (for the past 4 years) has definitely made staying in shape a lot easier for me. I'm outdoorsy, so you'll catch me on a bike, hiking, swimming or running in the park before you see me on a treadmill at the gym! I drink A LOT of water. Anywhere from 2 liters to a gallon a day. I juice greens first thing in the morning, every morning, and try to eat something every 2 hours. Nothing processed, fatty or sugary. I completed P90x earlier this year which was pretty intense but so fulfilling! I was proud of myself for actually finishing. All of my friends stopped after a week...lol. I always go back to those dvds when i'm feeling a little off.
Is there a moment or event that changed the path of who you are today?
I got uber sick (kidney) a few years ago, completely unexpectedly, and was literally in bed for months. The doctors couldn't do anything to help except suggest creeper surgeries, prescribe more and more medications and charge me! I started doing research on alternative medicine and nutrition, to see what I could figure out on my own. I applied a lot of the new found knowledge to my everyday life. Bought a juicer. Stopped eating meat/chicken. Changed my overall diet. Became more physically active (even through the pain). Completely took control of my own body and mind. Started doing yoga and meditating. Writing in journals (since health is just as much mental as it is physical). I even completely stopped taking the meds and told the doctor I was going to heal myself naturally. I'll never forget that day. It was so empowering! He looked at me like I was insane and started pumping all kinds of fear into me by reminding me of all the health risks. My mother and friends were livid thinking my rebellious nature had gone too far. But wouldn't you know, I completely healed myself through my own research! I watched documentaries like "Food Matters", "Food Inc" and "Fat, Sick & Nearly Dead" for that extra push. It became an obsession. I knew I could do it. And I totally did. Months later I was completely cured. Haven't had any health related issues since! Not even a cold! It motivated me to spread the word on the importance of nutrition, especially in our urban communities where the education, access and resources aren't readily available. My goal with the blog is to inspire others to be as curious, aggressive and as bold! In every realm of life. No one is going to fight for you or take care of you like you can.
What is the best advice you could give someone?
Focus on your calling! Your unique design! Everything else you're worried about will fall into place as it needs to.
Favorite food?
Mexican food is my ultimate weakness and I'm also a sucker for all things kale!
One word to describe yourself?
Free
What do you want your contribution to this world to be?
I want to help people feel good about themselves...just as they are. That simple.
Crossing the finish line after completing Ironman 70.3 a 1.2 mile swim, 56 mile bike and 13.1 mile run. A goal I have had since I was a child. I held my face right after because the tears started flowing I was so happy.
Throughout my entire life I have always been a goal setter. I think of so many things that I want to accomplish on a daily basis. I make list. I dwell on the goals. Sometimes I forget them and other times as the months pass the goals become less important. I am a great goal setter (most of us are) however, I have not always been a “goal finisher.” There are many goals I have set for myself that I have not reached.
One specific time in 2008 I set all of these goals after watching the documentary The Secret. I filled my apartment with affirmations about receiving a new car, homes that I wanted to own and money in my bank account. It is quite comical thinking about it now. I sincerely expected to get these material items by concentrating on them. Even if I had received them, the happiness of the attaining that goal would not have lasted because my motivation for receiving these items was rooted in my ego.
I also remember the weight lose goal. Every New Years Eve this was my resolution. I would exercise and eat right for maybe 2 months then give up. I tried almost everything (healthy and unhealthy) to lose weight but nothing happened. Finally, I have succeeded at this goal! However, this is because my motivation has changed. I am not focused on the scale I am focused on the fun I have competing in sports. I am not focused on my dress size I am focused on being happy and healthy. In those HARD years of trying to lose weight I was at the gym running on the treadmill thinking about how sexy I would be and how all my ex boyfriends would die when they saw me. My motivation then was rooted in negativity and thus my goal never came to fruition.
The truth is the motivation behind our goals is directly linked to the success or failure of that goal. Why do you want to lose weight? Why do you want to have a wildly successful career? Why do you want to be wealthy? Dig deep to find where the motivation behind these goals are rooted. If the goals are rooted in expectations placed on you, vanity, revenge or a self centered fantasy chances are you wont be a “goal finisher” and more importantly you wont be happy.
The sky is the limit on the success that you can have in life, but it all depends on your motivation. Is it positive or negative?
What do you think? What hinders people from reaching their goals? What is your motivation behind a big goal you have for yourself? Leave a comment.
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